MY STORY

On the 1st of November 2019 my beautiful, kind but most of all seemingly happy mum decided to take herself to heaven. On the 1st of November a part of me died with her. I was 17 years old, three weeks before my 18th birthday, I barely knew who I was or what I wanted to be and yet suddenly in the short time it took my dad to say ‘they’ve found her body’ my whole life had fallen apart. My mum was the life of every party, everything she did was with a spring in her step and her smile was utterly contagious. So when the news came out that she was gone everyone that knew her, even slightly, was left broken. Especially me, she wasn’t just my mum she was my best friend and she was gone and the only person I wanted to talk to about my pain was the one who had caused it because that’s the issue with suicide, it doesn’t end the pain it simply passes it on to someone else. I want my mum to be remembered as the happy, loving self that she was and when people think of her I don’t want them to feel sad or wish they could of saved her, I want them to remember that in the short 37 years she lived she made more of an impact on others than some people do after 95 years. This blog is going to be about me and my journey of acceptance and healing with the hope that it can help others through their journey too.